It’s Official

I'm FAT!!! (don't worry this is not a weight loss blog, just someting I'm going through right now)

Of course anyone who's ever known me will think "damn she's just figuring that out".  I've been overweight most all of my life and at one point about 5 years ago I had lost a bunch of weight and wasn't skinny but felt really good about myself.  BUT… since then A LOT of things have changed.  About 4 years ago I started my current job, in which I sit at a desk all day on my ass.  I got married and acquired 2 step children to go with my 1 child I had already and then WHAM I got pregnant.  My youngest is now 2 and I'm the heaviest I've ever been.  I need to lose about 100 lbs and have made excuses for myself.  I realize I have NO will power and since I quit smoking about the same time I got my job I really have NO will power.

The thing is, you know when you're fat, you realize that.  BUT you just don't realize how fat you are until you have to buy a bathing suit.  That it when it really hit me.  I haven't worn a bathing suit in quite a while.  I got one last year for the beach but wore shorts and a shirt over it and i think I was about 20 lbs lighter then.  So were headed to the beach next week and I wanted to got try some bathing suits on and see if I though I could find one that fit and not be so uncomfortable in it that I felt like I had to cover it up.  Well I went and after some digging I finally found one big enough for me to wear and really like it on.  This is when I came to one BIG realization, I'm huge.  Have you ever been to a truck stop and seen the gag gift of these HUGE panties hanging on the wall.  Well that's what I felt my bathing suit was like.  When I held it up it was like I could of cut it up and made bathing suits for my whole family with it. 

Needless to say TheGrump and I are going to start diet and exercise once we get back from the beach.  Maybe if I hang the bathing suit in the kitchen that will be the will power I need to get my ass in shape. 

Wish me luck 🙂