Can’t shake the feeling

I’ve been angry with someone for over a week. I can’t seem to get over it. Even tho this person has done things to get back in my good graces. But not the one thing that he needs to do to make things right…….

So my love life has been crap. 3 failed marriages…… Yes count them 3. At the age of 34 that’s something trying to tell me to give up lol. It’s a long story on this last one but I’ve got my girls and that’s all I need. It’s hard being a single mom. Especially one of a teenager.

Off to bed….. Maybe tomorrow will be better.


Aren’t you just great

Yes we all know your great.

Your just so freaking perfect.

Yes I know that your problems are always bigger and and what you have to say is more important.


***sorry guys but a gal has got to have some place to vent or her head will explode and lose her job.  Good news on that though is that I have an interview on Thrusday 🙂  Cross your fingers.

Anyone have a cure for the terrible twos ?  Anyone?  Please?  Queenie doesn’t comprehend that most food needs to be cooked and that you can’t eat frozen chicken nuggets and you have to cook eggs before you eat them.  She refused to eat last night because everything she wanted needed to be cooked and when I tried to cook anything she went into convulsions on the floor.  And then after all that she demanded ice cream for supper.  Although wanting to give in, I held my ground. 

hopefully this week gets better 🙂


Randomness of the week

Oh my where to start.  Well I took my second week of vacation this week to try and get some stuff done around the house and do some things with the kids.  Well it started off good was getting the house clean and planning some trips to the lake with the kids.  I got a call first thing Monday from my office manager (which normally isn’t unusual because they always call me while I’m on vacation.)  But this time was different.  She was freaking out because evidently one of the places I interviewed at was calling to check my references.  Which I thought was odd because I was suppose to have a second interview with them and they never called me back to do it.  So anyway, she was wanting to know if she needed to put an ad in the paper hiring new help.  I said no but that yes I had applied because I was looking to make more money.  She gave me that I ought to feel lucky for what I make now…………………..anyway  I wonder what she really said to them because I have heard nothing back from them at all.  Not even a rejection letter or a followup interview.  So who knows.  Now things will probably be even more uncomfortable at work now because they really had no clue I was looking for something else. 

So anyway got some stuff cleaned this week and we went to the lake a few times.  The kids were hoping to go again today but I had to come into work today (go figure) because the office manager wanted to leave early because her sister in law is having a baby shower today at 6 p.m.  Why she needed to leave at 1 p.m. who knows?  but that’s the norm around here.  If that were me I’d get the big “why must you leave so early” speech.  Which I could understand if she were giving the baby shower but she’s not.  I am the peon here and defiantly get treated like it.  I hate that everything is one sided and that people constantly leave early and got to do this and got to do that, but when it comes to something like kids doctor appointments and such I have to work around what they think I should do.  Hello if my kid is sick (which luckily rarely happens where I take off work) then I need to take them to a doctor.  I don’t know I guess a lot has built up and gotten on my nerves these last 4 years.  I really want to feel like my job makes a difference in the world and I only feel like it destroys more than it helps.  I guess that’s what I get working for a divorce attorney. 

Anyway I’m here at work and my kids are patiently waiting on me to get off so we can cook out tonight when I get home. 



I’m crossing my fingers and pissed….

since this is a new blog I guess I’ve never mentioned that I am on the search for a new job.  Well it’s not that I hate my current job……….well sometimes I do, but not totally it’s just that I don’t get paid near enough for what I do.  And since it’s a small law firm it’s not like they’re going to come off a big whopping salary.  There is something else I’d love to do but it’s going to take a while to get that done, so I’ve looked at other things in the mean time. 

Got a call on Friday and have an interview tomorrow with a company as an Administrative Support Specialist………which is garbledeegook for Secretary or something of that nature.  Hopefully they’ll want me and want to pay me what I’m looking for.

On a second note I’m entirely pissed.  I am wanting to see about going back to school and become an RN.  I currently work during the day and there aren’t really any jobs that will let me work evenings and pay me anything decent.  So I’ve checked into our local nursing school at the hospital as well as the program they have at the community college.  Neither offer night classes and don’t plan to offer them.  Now I’m looking into another school which is 45 min away.  This gets me because the local ones are like 15 min away.  UGH….

Hope everyone had a great 4th.  I sure did. 


Hell in a Handbasket

Do you think someone would go to hell if they jumped up and shook a preacher during a vacation bible school closing?  Well let's just say I came pretty close to doing this very thing last night. 

My mother in law asked me to help her with vacation bible school this week and I agreed that I would help her Mon., Tues., and Wed. and I would pack for the Beach the other two days and she would keep Queenie for me.  So last night was my first night of helping and we were both presently suprised that Queenie went to her toddler class and didn't cry for either one of us much.  I was so proud of her for being a big girl.  She's only 2 and she's going through some attachment issues probably because we've taken her passie away and potty training her at the same time.

So on with the story.  The church has a new pastor and he seemed to be very fun and he and his wife are also very young, around 25ish.  Like I said Queenie went to her class and did so well.  Her teacher brought her to our class right before the ending "rally" of VBS.  She was smiling and telling me what she did.  Then we went out for the rally and she saw the rest of her class and wanted to go sit with them………

let me stop for a minute and say that this church is tiny and usually only has about 15-20 members who attend on a regular basis, so the actual church building itself is not very big…………

 …….to continue………Queenie went to sit with her class when her teacher gave her a manilla envelope to give to me, so of course trots back accross the church to bring it to me.  She returns to her class and is sitting with the other kids and her teacher has her run me one more thing, so again she brings it to me and returns to her class.  I see her over there with the rest of the little kids and they're playing in the floor in front of the pew.  The pastor is talking to the congragation about how glad he is that everyone had come and what lesson they learned today and so on ……  Then I see Queenie get up and start back toward me at the exact moment she was walking right in front of the pastor he leans down puts his hand out and stops her.  At first I thought he was just kidding around with her but then he directed her to go back with her class and sit.  When she got back with her class and sat down her little lip poked out and my heart broke all at the same time.  She began to bawl and I guess my momma bear instincts hit me and my first reaction was to jump up and shake him and say "what the hell are you doing? she's just a baby".  MY baby, not his (he doesn't have any children).  I didn't shake the pastor (although I wanted to) I immediately got up and went to get her.  I believe her feelings were hurt more than anything else, but it still made me feel like he had no right!  She was just coming back to sit with me. 

So now I have to endure two more nights of helping with VBS and avoiding the pastor, because if not I do believe there will be a HOLY SMACKDOWN……………